Happy...and Worried

Damn. I actually thought that Sec 4 was gonna be REALLY REALLY FUN man.

I mean Handling so much shit sometimes makes you forget what you are trying to achieve actually. I want to achieve SO MUCH but I have NO IDEA how the hell I gonna achieve them.

So Far Everything is been screwing up: I let my whole team down during cross nats...Morrison is the laggiest house currently - I think so (How does eugene phua do it?!?!)...Fortunately my studies hasn't been dropping so much.

But have you ever been through the position such that YOU REALLY WANT TO HAVE FUN...but when you start thinking about all your commitments and how much life has been screwing you up...you just lose it and emo for the rest of the day.

Read WEI HAN'S Post and I REALLY FEEL THE same way...I hate to be forgotten. I came into RI wanting to leave an impact in the school, something others would look to as an example. This whole year I been trying so damn hard to juggle all the responsibilities and it's extremely difficult to focus on ONE commitment and leave an impression BECAUSE YOU HAVE OTHER STUFF that comes your way. DAMNNNNNN

And when all else starts to fail, you try fall back on your academia, that's when u realise....Your studies also dropping. And you begin to think u are an ultimate failure. HAHAA

But then, something happens, and you bounce back almost immediately

Disappointment drives you to do better

Yes. Many of you knew what had happened to the RI X-Country B-Div Team.

Many say it's not my fault. But haha srsly just think straight. If I had gotten into the top 10, the results would have been drastically differeny. But i didn't, instead I drag everybody else down to 5th.

Anyway forget about that.
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I think i should join XC in JC. I mean I wouldn't want my stamina, which I have developed after 3+ years of hardcore training, to go to waste. And I want to leave school knowing that I was good at something and I pursues it all the way to the end. If you start something, carry it through to the end.

I used to have this deep-seated mindset that Cross Sucks. Joining cross had never crossed my mind in JC. In fact I had never pictured my JC life with X-Country inside. I always looked forward to my last track event in Sec 4 because then it's OVER. It seems quite surreal but I think I am going to join cross in JC. Unknowingly, I think Cross has just become part of my lifestyle. Seems pretty weird. How motivation can change mindsets.

Even I can't believe myself.

Focusing on Track Nats now. All the best RI Track & Cross

I Mugged Chinese =)

I spent 1 1/2 hours MUGGING CHINESE TODAY =)

So proud of myself.

I think i should do this everyday. By the time Os come I'll be in tip-top condition. SO THAT I CAN GET MY A1!!!!

But i wasted the rest of the day slacking and surfing the net. hahaha

Season's in a week

Here comes the time when you look at the title and u wonder "what the hell should I write"

Anw, what is going through my head almost every second now is SEASON!!!
I think it might be my last year in RI XC (maybe..) so I really want to make this year a highly memorable one...

I was scanning through facebook looking through photos of the RIXC in the past...when we were toddlers in sec 1 and 2.

felt quite inspired because the team was extremely bonded and they left a lasting legacy (in which Mr Lim always uses as a GOOD EXAMPLE)...So I really really pray that we will do VERY VERY well this year and hopefully be like our seniors who have long gone and vanished =)

The Big day is in 7 days time. Now everything in my life revolves around that particular day.

But beneath all the anxiety, there's a calm and soothing sensation.
Not sure why

Ben =)