One of Life's Really Tough Decision

Ok. It's a really really tough decision to make. Today the sec 4s finally crossed over to RJC for training, which is really sad cos we won't see them for trg anymore =(. It also means that we are the most senior now, and we will carry the responsiblity of the team.

But it also got me thinking, real hard about one thing. Should I continue in JC or not?

One side says that well, to put it in honest terms, since i'm reasonably good at running i should continue. I shouldn't make all of this 4 years of traininggo to waste. Furthermore, everyone has high expectations of me and I can't disappoint them.

On the other side, I have the feeling like "I'm bored of running" and I dun think I will be interested to run next time. I wanna try something new, like learn a new sport and excel in it.

But today, I decided not to let go of this issue, I gonna make a wise choice.

Its more of a Passion vs Talent thing. But thinking deeper into this maze, I realised that the passion is there but something is hindering it from igniting. I think it's because I'm afraid. Fear. I afraid of doing long runs, intervals, But i like easy runs =).

Because I feel that i am pressured to win in all my competitions, and i'm also quite alone. Think of it, unless cheng lu really improves like crazy, I feel as if I have to be the saviour of the team's position. And if i fail, then omg. No back-up. And during the intervals, there won't be someone to pace and no one to follow during long runs. But yet pressure is important to push people further. What a stupid contradiction.

Running is fun, but it ain't fun without a partner to strive together.

Therefore, I consulted my father. Like everyone else, he encouraged me to continue. But he stated that the schools needs a representative to participate in competitions, and if I don't do it no one else would.

"Everyone loses interest in a sport somehow, it's a very normal thing, but it's the perseverance thats keeps us going" - said by Dad. Well, it did change my mindset in someway.

Right, I also think im thinking far to negatively about cross country. Its like now I just think X-C is like

Long Runs = Damn Sian and have to wake up damn early in the morning,

Intervals = Makes me die.

But there again, if so many people in RJ can continue and yet enjoy it, I dun think that there is a reason why I can't. Maybe it's not that bad, it's just the competitions that makes you wanna shiver. But all sports face strong competition, there's no way to hide from it.

Oh yah, I guess if i just stop at Secondary school is like Ban Tu Er Fei. if I give up cross, it will be damn sad. Because I already gave up Teakwondo, Wushu and im like damn lazy to even go for my Wushu trainings nowadays (I have't gone for 5 months =P). So if I stop its like, all my acheivements is cut short in Sec Sch.

I am gonna make sure I guaduated from JC feeling satisfied, that I completed a long hard race. I started this race, i've gotta finish it.

So am I gonna quit or not?

Well, Let's just say I will keep my options open, I dun wanna decide to early, although I know that the arguements is like obviously tipping on the "go for it"side. But for now I will just concentrate on B div nats. But I'm be inclining towards continuing though.

BUT I WANT TO HAVE A PARTNER TO RUN WITH IN JC. Someone who is like same or better than me so I can work with him and he can work with me. Mutual thing. Then we can improve together, yeah you know that kind of logic.

I'll decide next year, just setting my boundaries out right. When I come to the bridge, then I will cross it. So dun get ur hopes to high.

Ben

Oh right. Lets find a quote that fits this:

" You can't go through life quitting everything. If you're going to achieve anything, you've got to stick with something." ~From the television show Family Matters